When to keep and when to toss the crap from your life and how to tell the difference. Including the Man in your World.
One misconception people have about antiques is that the older they look, the more antique they must be. Wrong! Appearance has nothing to do with it. Just because a piece looks like it came out of grandma’s attic doesn’t mean it’s an antique–even though grandma might be. Not in the true sense of the word. If no one wants it, no matter how old it looks, it’s just a piece of junk. Antiques have value, and that value is based on demand due to suitability and limited supply.
I am not as abusive as Harvey Weinstein, nor as narcissistic as Bill O’Reilly. I’m more respectful to women than Donald Trump, and not as sleazy as Anthony Weiner.
Judged by the standards set by these public reprobates, most of the rest of us men appear almost saintly, and therein lies a danger. The public disclosure of these men’s behavior — from the routinely offensive to the occasionally criminal — is a good thing, and all those who have been harassed and raped should continue to speak out.
But we should not let the most egregious cases derail the analysis of how a wide range of men’s intrusive and abusive sexual behaviors against women (as well as against girls, boys, and vulnerable men) are so woven into the everyday fabric of life in a patriarchal society that the intrusion and abuse is often invisible to men.
Pause for the required disclaimer: Not all men are rapists. To acknowledge that sexuality in a culture of institutionalized male dominance (a useful shorthand definition of patriarchy) takes place within a larger framework of male domination/female subordination is not to accuse all men of rape.